The Viktor Wilt Show

Morning, everybody. It's the Victor Wilt Show. I hope Tuesday's treating you good so far. Sorry you've gotta be awake right now. It's early, I know. [rock music] Oh, man. Another thing I know is that I'm sure everybody's gonna be glad tomorrow when all of this election business is over with. My entire social media feed just mayor mayhem. Get out and vote today. Polls open, I believe, at 8:00 AM and are open till, I believe, 8:00 PM. I shoulda looked that up before I said it, but I'm pretty sure I'm right on that. I, I might be wrong. I'll look it up in a bit. Anyway, uh, get out and vote. Don't forget, all right? Do your part, Pocatello and Idaho Falls. And then, uh, yeah, social media can get back to, I don't know, whatever, whatever other things people like to scream at each other about. [rock music] As I was scrolling this morning, you know, found something that wasn't related to the elections. Poor people hacks. Now, [laughs] I have certainly been poor before. Feeling poor this morning. Payday can't come soon enough just so I can, you know, get poor again by paying my bills. But, uh, poor people hacks are probably handy for just about anybody, and I'm curious what these are 'cause [stutters] I probably could have used a list like this, uh, in my younger days. All right. Poor people hacks you picked up during a hard time you still use today even if you don't have to. Uh, somebody mentioned the library. Yeah, reading! Reading for free. You don't have to buy books to read. You can go to the library. Uh, I never thought of that as a poor people hack, but, uh, hey, it's always good to remind people to read, including myself, 'cause I've been, uh, sucking at reading even though I have a lot of books at my house. One of these days [sighs] I'll just be done with the 10 billion things that need to be done around there, and I can go to bed early and read a nice book before falling asleep. Yeah. One of these days. All right, this person mentioned, uh, learning to love their Crockpot and eating the same meal for an entire week.

Y- you know, if you make a good Crockpot meal, it's not gonna be that bad to eat the same thing for an entire week. I know it- it does get old, but... Crockpots are great. You know, you, you get the thing going early in the day, and then you don't have to worry about cooking later. Yeah, I should probably, uh, do that more often as well. Might save a little bit of time. Uh, let's see. Parks and trails are free entertainment that make you healthier and less depressed the more you use them. Uh, use 'em now before the weather changes. [laughs] Little brisk out there this morning. I don't know if I'm gonna go for a hike today, but... [rock music] I feel like I've been getting some exercise. You know, I'm kinda sore from carrying speakers up and down my stairs. That was some exercise. All right, the good old-fashioned rotisserie chicken. Yeah, you know, that... That's a nice, convenient, and, uh, pretty cheap hack to eat yourself some food, save some time as well. The chicken's cooked already. Let's see. Google the fix for something that's broken, and if you think you can do it, try. Uh,

that's what, uh, I've got a JD for. [laughs] "Help me! Help me, JD! I don't know how to do this!" And then, uh, I, I guess I could Google these things a lot of the time, but

not everybody has a JD. You know? Some o- some of you, you gotta use Google. Let's see here. See how many days you can go without spending a dollar, then try to beat your previous record. That... That's an interesting one. [laughs] It would encourage you to go through all that food in your cupboards that you're like, "Uh, I don't have anything to eat." And then if you actually looked, you probably have a whole bunch of crap. Uh, most of these seem to be food-related hacks. You know. Don't go to the grocery store hungry. Yeah, but then you... I don't know. I don't know. [rock music] I guess if you wanna avoid buying treats, but sometimes treats are good. You know? And you're gonna pick the best ones if you go when you're hungry. Okay, they're talking about repairing your socks. Okay. I don't know about that one.

You can go to Ross and buy some pretty cheap socks. I don't know if I wanna sew my socks up. Into the garbage they go. All right. Buy store brands. I, I think that's common sense, right? Help out your neighbors. See, that's just something good to do, 'cause then, you know, you'll, you'll feel good about yourself and you're doing something good for your neighbors, but also then, you know, they might return the favor one of these days. All right, we get it with all of the food deals. All right? Let's see. Out of toothpaste. Cut the tube open and scrape it [laughs] clean. I've never done that. Uh, it makes sense. Wonder how much toothpaste is wasted that's just stuck in the tube. Huh. All right.

All of... All this stuff's just making me hungry. They're just talking about a bunch of different food items. [rock music] Listening to some Prime has got me thinking about this article I saw the other day [laughs] about the first South Park video game. It was on Nintendo 64. It was just called South Park. And, you know, if you're a long-time listener, you know I love South Park. One of my favorite shows of all time. When that game came out, I was so excited 'cause it was a South Park video game, and it was garbage. It was a terrible video game. I guess th- there's a cult following. Like, some people just love that game.[instrumental music] They get it out every Thanksgiving 'cause, uh, one of the parts of the game, you're, like, shooting turkeys or something. I am so glad that they eventually got around to making good South Park video games. I mean, it took, what, 20 years? But when The Stick of Truth came out, I think that was the South Park game that all South Park fans had been waiting for. I need to play through both of the newer South Park games again. The Stick of Truth and The Fractured But Whole, it's, uh, just the second one is so good. I mean, they're both really good, just masterpiece video games. Now, if you're not into RPGs, you're probably not gonna dig 'em, but if you're a South Park fan and you want as close as it's gonna get to actually playing a South Park cartoon, I mean, th- that's basically what you're doing, and they are so fun. Now, they did put out another South Park game a year or so ago. I never even tried that one. It was, uh, I don't know, it's just not my style of a game. It was like a, a live action and, uh, I think kinda 3D game. Probably a flashback, you know, to the, the Nintendo 64 game; it was just garbage. That's why [laughs] I didn't even give it a shot. But those two, the RPGs, they are just so good, they're crazy. Uh, rated mature for a reason. Aah! You know, it's like watching South Park. There are some wild moments in those games.

I don't know if I could ever get myself to stop playing Red Dead. I need to play a new video game. Becca and I picked up the latest God of War a, a couple of months ago. It's just collecting dust. We gotta get around to playing that. Maybe when we get that house cleaned up. We're, we're almost there, I, I, I think. Got quite a bit done last night

and I had to deal with, uh, cleaning out the lizard cage and giving him some upgrades. Hopefully he's liking it. Yeah, I didn't get a chance to check on him this morning 'cause I didn't want to, uh, wake everybody up, but hopefully he's digging it. Put some rocks in there, you know, a stick. [laughs] I don't know. There's only so much you can do for a lizard, but anyhow. Yeah, if you're looking for something fun to do, play those South Park games, those RPGs. As for the rest of the South Park games, I, uh, can't say too much, but those are some good stuff. All right. Uh, I hope today continues to move by at a reasonable pace. [rock music] Okay. I just gotta say please don't use AI to make your political decisions. [laughs] All right, it's voting day. Don't forget to get out and vote. Run-off elections in Pocatello and Idaho Falls, it takes like two minutes. Just do it. Make your voice heard. Local elections, your vote really matters. But I saw somebody make a post where they asked AI, like, "Based on blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, who should I vote for?" And what AI does is it scrapes places like social media, and if you're trying to dig up information on a local election, there's only so much information out there. And the bulk of that information

is just what people are saying on Facebook. So it, you know, goes through all this information and then spits out a report. How many times have I pointed out just complete errors and inconsistencies with the Google AI search results? I've seen it give out completely false information because it's only got a limited amount of places it can dig stuff up. So, the comment section of places like Life in Idaho Falls, that is not f- necessarily factual information. That's what, you know, an AI [laughs] you know, that's just trying to pull whatever information it can find is going to pull from. All right?

Make an educated decision when it comes to your voting, all right? Look up interviews with the candidates or, I don't know, have some discussions with people. Go back and forth. Don't just punch it into, you know, ChatGPT or Grok or something and go, "All right. Thank you, AI. [laughs] I, I don't need to think for myself." Uh, sorry. Just one of the posts I just saw was so ridiculous. I'm like y- you can get AI to give you whatever kind of answer you want by phrasing your question in a certain way. So, to then take that information and share it like, "Look at, look what AI says," just ridiculous. Oh, I can't wait for

the election to be over and people to go back to fighting about, uh, whatever other kinda garbage. Uh, I don't know, holidays or whatever. My Facebook feed's just infested with mayoral race stuff, which is fine 'cause it's reminding people to get out and vote.

So, you need to get out and vote. Do it. It'll only take you a couple of minutes. You can register at the polls. Bring your ID and a piece of mail showing where you live. They'll get you all signed up and then bam. I mean, there, there's, like, two things to vote on in each city, all right? It's pretty easy. It's not like you- you're gonna have to go through multiple pages of ballots. It's just gonna be bam, bam, in and out, done. So, I'm gonna do it on my way home, swing by the old school, get my voting done, and then I, I guess get back to chores. Ugh. I'm so tired of chores. One of these days, rest. One of these days. [rock music] We went to the pet store last night 'cause we needed to get some crickets for the gecko.

Apparently, there's a cricket shortage or something. Had to go to multiple places and, uh, I didn't realize there's only two places to get crickets in Idaho Falls, and[instrumental music] I was getting a little bit worried 'cause if there were no crickets, it's like, "We gotta feed this gecko something." And one of the things, maybe it was Stuart who recommended, were cockroaches. Ugh! I'm sorry, there's just no way, even if they were in a container. Well contained in a container, that I could bring cockroaches in my house. They're just too disgusting. And I don't know if simply mentioning that word is why this article came up, but this is gross, 'kay? I'm gonna warn you. This is a gross story. For some reason, somebody dug up an old Florida Man story

from 2012, and this is one of the most horrific things I've, I've read in a while. So, just be forewarned. If you don't like cockroaches and eating bugs, you're not gonna like this. Okay, so they apparently, in West Palm Beach back in 2012, had a cockroach eating contest. And the prize, the grand prize, was a snake, a python. So, whoever eats the most cockroaches wins a snake. This is a terrible competition. [laughs] You know? Just go buy a snake, all right? It's not worth it. And it was not worth it for Edward Archbold, or Arcbold.

Uh, he dead, yeah. Yeah, he started, uh, choking during the competition.

You know, had, uh, cockroach fragments-

Wow

... blocking his airway and then he died. Jeez! Ugh. That's just, like, the most horrific way to go I could possibly imagine. 'Cause

the, the, the eating part's bad enough as it is. Bad enough as it is. And it says they were alive. Ugh! All right, sorry. I know it's a little early for that kinda thing, but I had to read it. I might as well share it with you. You know? Be failing as a radio host if I don't share that kinda content with you. Just in time for breakfast? Nom, nom, nom, nom! But yeah, thankfully we did find crickets and, uh, the little fella's happy. Little Jacob. We think it's a b- I, I, I don't even know why we think it's a boy. Could end up being a girl. I don't, I don't know how you'd tell when they're that small, but, ugh. I'ma close this tab. It's disgusting. And we'll be back in a minute with some bad omens by request for backup. If you wanna hear a song, you can always call me. I'm here doing it live, not one of those pre-recorded radio shows. I'll play you a song, maybe. 208-535-1015. All right, I gotta find some Freak News. I'll be back. [instrumental music] Well, Christmas time's approaching, everybody. Time to talk Christmas movies. I don't care what anyone says, Die Hard is a Christmas movie. Apparently, Macaulay Culkin recently was doing some type of a live panel and said he didn't consider Die Hard to be a Christmas movie, and the entire crowd booed him. Well, apparently, folks in the UK got his back, 44% of those polled saying they did not believe Die Hard to be a Christmas movie.

It takes place at a Christmas party, all right? If Christmas is in the movie, it's a Christmas movie, [laughs] all right? And there, there are people who don't think Gremlins is a Christmas movie. It's about a kid who gets a, a gremlin for Christmas. I guess it's a Mogwai. It doesn't become a gremlin till you feed it after midnight, but

absolutely Christmas movies. Ah, that's the UK. What does their opinion matter? All right, here's a good reason to not have a, uh, destination wedding [laughs], and also be careful on the beach. A family from Kansas went to, uh, Cabo for a destination wedding in June. They're out walking on the beach with grandma and, I don't know if you're aware, but the ocean, it's dangerous, okay? Grandma got swept into the ocean. Ugh! She lived, she's all right, but yeah, don't you think that would put a little bit of a, a damper on the festivities?

Grandma gets swept away into the sea and is gone? Mm-hmm. Ugh, yeah. Be an unpleasant way to go. I, I think it would be worse than the, than the guy who... Well, I don't know. Choking on, uh, cockroaches and dying during a cockroach eating contest or being swept away into the ocean. Both [smacks lips] not my preferred way to go. What else do we got here? All right. Apparently, Google... Ugh, hold on, let me get some music going. [instrumental music] Google has done something for, uh, Android phones that they're saying, in this article I'm reading here, could allow employers to intercept and

archive your text messages. [laughs] Don't talk crap on your boss on your Samsung. Yeah. I, I don't know, this is a long, like, scientific-y article here and it kinda hurts my brain to read through, you know, all these big words. So, I don't really wanna read through it, but you, you can Google that up, uh, if you wanna find out more. [laughs] Just again, I guess, be careful what you're saying about your boss. They could potentially read it. A- again, you, you gotta look this up for yourself. It's too much for my brain right now. Too tired. Don't climb into the lion enclosure, okay? Uh, that's my final parting message for you on Freak News here. A kid in Brazil decided, "Hey, look at that! It's the lion, you know, pen. I'm gonna climb on in." Well, he's no longer with us.[instrumental music] "I guess he had dreamed of being a lion tamer." Okay, um, there's gotta be classes or something you go to for that. You don't just climb into the lion pen. Lions are giant cats that can eat people, okay?

If you see a mountain lion in the woods, you don't... I- I- I joke about it, being like, "Come here, kitty. You want some scratches? Come here. That's a good boy." It- it's not gonna work out that easy, okay? Don't actually do that. I mean, you, you could try doing it with a regular cat, and sometimes they lose their mind. Now, Koopa, my cat, dependent on how recently Jess has tried to swat at him on top of the cat tree, he get very grumpy when you try to pet him when he's frustrated. So imagine if he was, like, as big as you or bigger. Mm-hmm. They got big claws and big teeth, people. Don't climb into a lion enclosure, or probably any kind of enclosure at the zoo. Monkeys will rip your face off. It's dangerous. Leave that up to the zookeepers. All right. It's a little after 8:00. Got tunes coming up. Hopefully, I can find more crap to talk about. [instrumental music] Crawlspaces in houses, they kinda give me the creeps. And I'm glad I've just got a basement, no crawlspace, 'cause sometimes you gotta get in there and, like, deal with stuff, and that- that- that's just not really my thing. A little bit claustrophobic. And you never know what you're gonna find in there. Now, this is in California, but seems like the type of thing that could happen around here. This guy, you know, he was seeing stuff kind of moved around outside of his crawlspace, so he set up a camera just to see if, I don't know, somebody was breaking into his house, rooting around. Well, somebody was, a 500-pound black bear,

and it just lives there now. [laughs] Yeah. It's just taken up residence. He's walking by the other day. He hears this growling and hissing. He's like, "Oh, okay." Uh, no. No. And he watched this thing crawling out of the crawlspace. This thing is big. It's a big boy. Um, [laughs] what are you supposed to do? [laughs] You know? I mean, you gotta wait for it to come out, right? And then try to block it off, but I... Bears are pretty smart. That's why they got those high-tech garbage cans. When you're, you know, out in Island Park or [laughs] anywhere that's a wooded area around here. Yeah, they g- they gotta try to fool the bears so they don't get into the garbage cans. How many videos have you seen of bears crawling into cars and things like that? Ugh. Bear living under your house. I mean, I got a lot of critters living in my house. Got a zoo. But at least I don't gotta deal with that. Jeez. And this guy, he's just kinda laughing about it.

I, I don't think I could sleep if there was a bear under, under my house. [laughs] I'd be like, "Animal Control, come o-... Get out here. Fish and Game, you gotta do something about this." And this isn't the first time I've seen one of these stories. I, I thought this was an old one, actually, 'cause I think it was about a year ago. There was some other family got a bear living in their crawlspace. I don't know. I guess, be aware where you live and

put a cage on that thi-... L- why does this guy not have his crawlspace blocked off? And I, how's the bear managing to get in there? Anyway. Just be bear aware. [laughs] [instrumental music] Polls are open, fools. Get out and vote. That's easy. You only gotta vote on two candidates. Take, like, two seconds. Bam, get her done. Get this mayoral runoff over with, and then we can get back to fighting about, I don't know, Christmas.

I swear, the news just tries to get people riled up. I'm scrolling Facebook, and Fox News posts, "Merry Christmas is back." Did Merry Christmas ever go anywhere? Why, why does this happen every year? The news tries to convince people that they're people fighting about the phrases Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays. Is anybody that passionate about it that they're actually fighting about this? Both phrases are just fine. You're wishing people well during the holidays. Happy Holidays? Ah, so offensive. Oh, no, Merry Christmas, so offensive. Which one bothers you worse, Peaches?

Don't tell me happy anything.

[laughs] Well, Peaches doesn't like-

[laughs]

... w-... you know, good wishes during the holiday season. Peaches is just wants to spread, uh, Grinch-style cheer-

[laughs]

... a- anti-cheer. [laughs] That's right.

Did you see Coast is calling it holiday music in LA? And there are tons of people in the comments, "It's Christmas music."

Ugh.

But there's a lot of different type of holiday songs, and some of 'em

don't necessarily have to do with Christmas.

I was kinda hoping Josh would, uh, call it c- classy holiday music, just to see how-

[laughs]

... many people around here-

I'm sure they would. "Rah!"

Yeah, yeah.

D- the news gets people crazy, dude. Th- they just try to get people riled up. Like-

When I worked at In-N-Out, uh, you were supposed to say Merry Christmas.

Okay.

And there's all these old customers that were like, "I'm so happy you guys say Merry Christmas and not Happy Holidays."

What's wrong with saying happy holidays? [laughs] Like, it's a nice message. I, I, I think you gotta be crazy if someone tells you happy holidays and you get mad. You need to go talk to a therapist.

You do that passive-aggressive, like, "No, it's Merry Christmas."

[laughs] It's like, "Dude, somebody's just trying to be nice. God." [laughs]

[laughs]

All right, we got a new message. Screw you!

[laughs]

We'll just walk around and say that during the holiday season.

I do.

[laughs] Oh, yeah. Peaches does. [laughs] All right, well again, polls are open people. Get out and vote. Tell people, "Happy Holidays." Tell them, "Merry Christmas." It's all nice. Both messages are good. [laughs]

Say screw you as well. [laughs]

Say screw you. Sure. [laughs] But you got till 8:00 PM. Get out and vote. It's easy. Peaches already voted today, didn't you?

Sure-

Peaches-

... let's go with that

... you need to get out and vote, fool.

No, screw you. [laughs]

[laughs]. Screw you!

All right, so just a minute ago, like literally 30 seconds ago, Josh Tyler from Classy97 stops by. You know, the co-King of Christmas in East Idaho, along with myself.

And he's like, "Hey, do you want to eat a gross pickle?" And I'm like, "I, I don't know. What does that mean?" Now, Josh, a while back, brought these. They were like pickle ball candies, sour pickle balls, and they were one of the most disgusting things I've ever eaten. Now, this morning, I still don't have an appetite. My appetite's been all messed up ever since I had the flu. Like, I can eat about half of the food that I would expect to be able to eat. And I don't know what a disgusting pickle is. So, we got Josh and Jade coming in here.

Josh-

Hello.

Hello. Um,

why don't you use, uh... Uh, dude.

You want me on the other one?

It's too bright, Jade. Don't turn the lights on.

We gotta be able to see Josh's pickle though.

Okay, hold on. Let me get mic four working here.

Oh, you changed them around? I could go over there.

Nah, 'cause Jade insists on using mic number three. It's his mic. [laughs]

It is. [laughs]

[laughs] So-

So, uh, this right here-

Mm-hmm

... is something I found. I've, I got a few treats. I just thought I'd bring in the first one.

His liquid-filled pickle.

This is [laughs] gummy liquid-filled pickles.

Gummy liquid-filled pickles?

Yeah.

Now, there's no way they could be worse than those sour pickle balls you brought that one time.

I was looking for those. They, I couldn't find those again.

Oh.

I really wanted to find some more of those.

Did you try one of those, Jade, when we had those? This smells-

No, I think I was out on that one.

Dude.

Chemically.

Oh.

Yeah. [laughs]

The sour pickle balls were real... Like, so bad. So, so bad.

Uh, that's a big pickle.

Dude.

[laughs]

Guppers Poppin' Pickles.

[laughs]

Why are they individually packaged like this?

You know-

So that-

... so you can give them out for Halloween, I don't know

... so the pickle juice doesn't spread.

Dude, I don't know about this.

So, here's what it says.

They're, they're squishy.

Juicy sour pickle artificial flavored center. So it's healthy.

[laughs]

Sweet pickle artificial flavored gummy candy. Poppin' Pickles. Guppers Gummie Liquid Filled Poppers.

[laughs]

Okay, here's the question. Do you eat it in one go, or do you just try and nibble off the tip here?

I don't... [laughs]

[laughs]

I don't know.

I don't know. I'm trying to get it open here.

Oh, it says, "Squeeze the edges."

To loosen up the thing?

Yeah, and it'll pop, and makes a poppy noise, I guess.

Oh.

Oh, yeah. It did. It made a poppy noise.

Oh. [laughs]

It doesn't smell that bad.

That's a- they're not bad.

Doesn't smell that bad.

Doesn't smell that good.

Yeah, but it's-

Oh, the texture.

Oh, the texture's messed up, dude.

Oh.

[laughs]

Um-

Ew.

How do you describe that texture?

Uh, gross?

It's like-

It's like a booger.

[laughs] It's-

It's sluggish.

I... Yes, sluggish.

[laughs]

You can feel the liquid in it.

[laughs]

I think you just have to pop the whole thing in your mouth, or the liquid might go everywhere.

Oh. [laughs] It might go everywhere anyway.

All right. Are we gonna one, two, three it?

I guess.

Are we gonna... I'm, I'm gonna put the whole thing in my mouth.

Where's the garbage can? I'm gonna throw up.

[laughs]

I've got one over here. Yeah, Jade doesn't handle this kinda stuff very good.

It smells like candy. It doesn't smell like-

Yeah, it doesn't smell like a pickle.

It doesn't smell like pickles. I expected it to taste like pickle. It might taste like pickle on the inside.

It, it might.

Oh. [laughs]

Hey, I might need that garbage can. Bring that-

[laughs]

... back over here. [laughs] Okay, guys. Uh, we- we'll have to, uh, take some... Do, do you have more of these, or is this it?

Oh, yeah.

Okay.

So, this thing is what, like, almost two inches long?

It, it, it's two inches long.

And about a half inch in width?

Uh, y- yeah, and it's like you said, kinda like a slug.

Oh.

Oh, Josh shaking it around over there. That's gross.

There you go, and you can... It's malleable.

Yeah. It's not like a-

It's like a bad finger. [laughs]

It's like a limp gummy.

[laughs] Oh.

[laughs]

A limp pickle gummy.

Yeah. [laughs] It's... You know, gummies are usually-

Oh, oh, Josh is going-

Uh, Josh is going, "Uh..."

All right.

These are candy.

Oh, this isn't bad at all.

No.

It's really chewy.

They're really chewy.

It's like chewing on the- a pencil eraser.

It doesn't taste like pickles.

The, the liquid is kinda sticky.

I didn't even notice any liquid in it.

I didn't either.

No.

Well, that was not the payoff I wanted, but-

No.

I really wanted it to taste like pickle.

It doesn't taste like pickle at all.

No.

This tastes like candy.

Yeah.

All right, you said you had other treats?

Uh-huh.

[laughs] What else you got? [laughs]

Right now?

Yeah, sure.

Oh, let me go look.

I'll take a quick break.

Okay.

We'll come back, and we'll, we'll see what else you got. [rock music] What, you've never heard that song, Josh?

[laughs]

I don't know if I have heard that one.

The Idaho song.

Is that... Yeah, it's, I think actually, yeah, it's been a few years, but I think have s- I have heard that, yes.

Yeah, I forget the guy's name, but it's up in Idaho.

Yeah.

And, uh, he's a, a reggae artist from Coeur d'Alene.

Yeah. [laughs] All right.

Well, I hit him up on Facebook one time and told him we play that song from time to time.

[laughs]

All right, so we got Josh and Jaden here. Uh, Josh, he brought us the, uh-

Well, any-

... limp, gooey pickle-

[laughs]

... a minute ago that we tried that wasn't too bad.

And filled with juice.

Anytime I end up out of town, I always try to find weird snacks to bring back-

Yes

... 'cause it's always fun. And so, I found those. They were, uh, not as disappointing as I'd hoped.

Yeah, I thought they were gonna be horrific.

Yeah.

Especially with the texture of them.

Yeah.

Ugh.

Yeah, they look absolutely horrible.

So then I found, uh, spicy freeze-dried candy.

Spicy freeze-dried candy.

That's right.

Okay.

So, but it kinda smells like, barn.

[laughs]

[laughs]

Oh, no.

It smells like a ranch store, that's for sure.

Uh, like-

So-

Like a ranch store. Okay. Not a Hidden Valley.

But not a, not like a, like, creamy, dippy goodness.

[laughs] No.

Mm, like-

Let me smell that.

There's-

[laughs]

Oh, and it kinda looks like what would come out of a back end of something that you would feed from a ranch store.

Yeah.

So I think what they've done is taken-

[laughs]

[laughs]

... freeze-dried Skittles.

And put spicy stuff on it.

And then put a bunch of spice on it.

Okay. [laughs] I'm gonna take a smell-

[laughs]

Hey, I'm gonna take a whiff of that.

We saw that just on the sidewalk. Look, you remember that, that ... Way to put it all over the board, dude.

[laughs] That's what the engineer's for. Sure. [laughs] Clean it up.

[laughs]

Remember that video where it was a, a dude putting fake poop on cars?

[laughs] It's a fake, it's a fake-a poop. Yes. It does kinda look like dookie. [laughs]

[laughs] Let's put it in our mouth.

All right.

Yeah, it does look like freeze-dried Skittles.

Uh-huh.

Okay. All right.

Oh.

Hm.

It's spicy, freeze-dried candy.

It's not too bad, either.

It's not good, though.

Mm.

The spice is interesting.

I think it's better than the pickle.

Tastes kind of like barn.

[laughs] Yeah.

What is that, like, that tajin stuff?

It feels a little spicier than tajin.

Hm. That's not too bad.

Uh-

I don't mind it. I don't mind it.

I- I don't like it.

I mean, it's gonna give me acid reflux, but-

[laughs] That's just because you're old.

[laughs] Here, I'll wipe off the board, Jade.

Go ahead.

There you go. Oh, hold on.

Yeah, it hits you in the throat.

Hit the back of my throat.

Yeah.

Maybe you need another liquid-filled pickle.

Yeah.

To wash down what's stuck in the back of your throat.

Ah.

I might. I might. Okay.

And then-

These ain't too bad.

No, they're not terrible. They are spicy. I was impressed by the spice, though.

Yeah.

It says it's got a tangy jolt and a magical crunch.

Yep.

[laughs]

And it does.

Uh-huh.

[laughs]

Accurate. [laughs]

And then the last one, we'll have to break open, uh, maybe later. Maybe at noon or something.

Yeah?

Uh, because it is a, a two-foot long gummy fire worm.

Gummy f- let me see it. Two-foot-

Each-

... long gummy fire worm

... bite is hotter than the last.

Oh, really?

So it gets progressively hotter as you eat it.

Yeah, we're gonna have to cut that one into-

Oh.

So you have to cut that into pieces.

Okay.

Uh, and, and-

Yeah, that's gonna take some prep.

Yeah. Uh, but, uh, the gummy fire worm-

[laughs]

... is the other one I brought back.

I just wanted to watch you guys eat it Lady and the Tramp style. One start at one end, one start at the other.

Let's go.

I'll start at my old dips.

[laughs]

Give me the hot end.

And I think there's two of 'em in here.

Now, when I was at the, um, the Chinese supermarket in Salt Lake, is that where you got this stuff?

Uh, no. I got these ones at, uh, World Market.

Oh, okay.

In, in Salt Lake, but yeah.

They had the- these bags. I think I might've shown one of the picture, of the little, tiny crabs.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, you showed me that.

Yeah.

Yeah, no thank you.

We're gonna bring those in.

You can keep your crabs.

No, I'm gonna share my crabs with you.

Let me tell you-

No, I don't want 'em

... what it says on the gummy fire worm. It says, "This item is extremely spicy. Consume at your own risk. Keep away from children and pets. Ages 14 plus."

Ages 14 plus?

Peaches, you're out.

[laughs] Sorry, boy. You're not old enough. Um, one, you were gonna bring in some ... Do you have the hot sauces here?

No, I took 'em in-

I have, I have 'em at my house too. Yeah.

Oh.

Yeah, I've got the-

Oh, wow

... bomb Beyond Insanity and the, uh, Last Dab from Hot Ones.

The bomb is so horrible.

It is not good.

It's just bad.

It's hot.

I was telling Becca the other day about the Toe of Satan, 'cause I, I got a couple of those at the house.

That one's by far the worst thing.

You think it's worse than the bomb?

Just because of the cinnamon.

Uh, it's so, so bad.

It's like a giant, red gummy bear on fire.

Yeah.

That- that's not chewable.

Have you tried-

It's like a hard candy, right?

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, have you tried it, Josh?

I don't need to.

You do.

I got nothing to prove.

You do.

[laughs]

You need to man up like the K-Bear crew and try the Toe of Satan. [laughs] The problem was is we tried all the peppers first, like, the actual peppers.

Yeah.

Even the Carolina Reaper. And the Carolina Reaper is actually a pretty tasty pepper. It's really hot-

As long as it ain't pickled

... but, but the flavor of this one-

[laughs]

Like, I didn't find the Toe of Satan hotter than the Carolina Reaper-

Um-

... necessarily. Even though it, by the Scoville scale, it is.

Yeah, well-

But the cinnamon-

The pickled Carolina Reaper, my body rejected.

Same.

I, I went in my mouth, and out it came.

[laughs]

Somehow, Brad swallowed it.

Two of 'em.

Oh, it was two of them, huh?

And then, 30 minutes later, we just found him in the studio just moaning. Eh.

Oh, yeah, I never even posted the video 'cause I was like, "Is this like an HR issue?"

[laughs]

Is he gonna die?

He didn't move for four or five hours.

[laughs]

Do I need to take you to the hospital?

Yeah, I kept calling and checking on him 'cause he was out back and he's like, "I can feel it moving through my intestines." [laughs]

It was just like an inch-

Just over. [laughs]

... at a time.

[laughs]

An inch.

And every time it moved,

he'd, he'd get more pain.

Uh, he was all pale. [laughs]

[laughs]

I was like, "Did we, are we gonna kill Brad?" [laughs].

It might only be one worm in here, but smell that worm.

Oh. Let me smell it. [laughs]

Smell Josh's spicy worm.

Yeah.

That doesn't smell that bad.

Yeah, but that, it's gonna be sneaky heat.

Well, we've tried some really hot stuff. So stuff's gotta be pretty toasty.

Okay.

Um, what, what was the name of that sauce Becca gave me the other day? I think we'll, we'll call it Butt Blaster.

Oh.

You know, you tried that sauce, Jade?

I think so.

Yeah, it, I mean, it had a really good habanero taste, but then they put the, the extract in it. That's how they make a lot of those sauces really, really hot. So you just get that chemical burn going on. It, it was, it was fairly brutal. Yeah.

Is there, anybody else's mouth still a little hot from that candy, or is it just me?

Just me.

I'm done.

It's, it's-

I got a hot tongue.

No, I'm good.

Yeah, it's, it's not too bad.

Yeah.

You know? We, we don't expect you to be tough.

Okay.

[laughs] Pickle man. [laughs] Well, anyway, noon we'll-

All right. Noon?

Crack open the worm. Noon, we're gonna share a worm.

[instrumental music] Well, thank you again to Josh Tyler for bringing us in some treats to try out. Generally, what we end up eating on, you know, this show or the noon hour, very disgusting foods. [rock music] These ones weren't too bad. The Guppers Poppin' Pickles, you know, had they tasted like pickle, I bet it would've been real bad. And the, uh, the texture and gooeyness, it was kinda disgusting, but, but not bad. And then the spicy freeze-dried candy, that, I actually thought that was pretty good. I liked it. We'll eat the hot worm later. I don't know, I think I'm gonna have to bring in some of those spicy mini

crabs. They're like actual little tiny crabs. So I'm at the, uh, Chinese supermarket in Salt Lake, had to grab some of those. I don't know, my sis- or, not my sister, my daughter said her boyfriend likes them, so maybe they're not too bad. It's just the thought of... I, I mean, you eat them shell and all.

I, I would imagine that would not be a disappointing level of disgusting. You know, the, the poppin' pickles, little, little bit disappointing on the disgusting factor. I was actually, uh, looking at a thread here about disappointing foods. Somebody asked online, "What food was the biggest disappointment when you tried it?" So we got the, uh, Guppers Poppin' Pickles. All right, they're saying the cheeseburger with donuts as the buns. They must've had a bad burger with a donut bun then. I don't know, do they still serve those at the fair? The ones they had at the fair with, you know, bacon and everything, they, they were bomb. It was excellent. I expected it to just be weird, but

it was really good. So I'm guessing this person just didn't get a very good one. All right, this person said, "This might sound stupid, but Pop-Tarts, we were never allowed to have them growing up. Wasn't for lack of asking. I spent my entire childhood wondering, 'What do they taste like?'" Yeah, I mean, Pop-Tarts, if you, like, [laughs] didn't ever try one your entire life, probably figure a really delicious treat, they're, they're pretty subpar. Now, did they, uh, cook it in the, uh, toaster? 'Cause they're definitely better if you cook, cook them, but, uh, sorry, had a hiccup for a second there.

And it also depends what kind of Pop-Tart. Some Pop-Tarts are definitely better than others. Grape Nuts. Okay.

Grape Nuts are one of the worst foods of all time, okay?

Now, if you get the Grape Nuts flakes, they're not too bad, but actual Grape Nuts, it's like chewing on rocks. They're horrible. Now, they, they said, uh, "Probably because of the name. Grapes are good. Nuts are pretty good." There's nothing grape or nuts about Grape Nuts. It's like grandma food, and it, it's, it's just awful. Ugh. Yeah. Definitely a disappointing food. All right, Turkish Delight. Now, I have heard of this.

I think when we looked at, uh, disgusting foods and things like that, Turkish Delight comes up. What, what is it again exactly? Let me Google this real quick here. Turkish Delight.

Oh, it looks like candy. Huh. Must be kinda cruddy candy. I don't know. I don't know if I've tried that. Huh. Maybe we'll have to order some. Oh, geez, it's not cheap.

So that would be disappointing if it sucked, spend that kind of money. Let's see. Fugu, blandest fish I've ever eaten. And now, isn't that the fish that can kill you? Yeah, I'm, I'm gonna pass on that. Dragon fruit. I, I think dragon fruit's good. It looks awesome too. I mean, it's pretty much like kiwi, right?

Yeah, maybe they had a bad one. Maybe they had a, a dull dragon fruit, 'cause dragon fruit's pretty good. And it's, it's fun. Like, kids get a kick out of it 'cause it looks i- insane. Uh, let's see. Somebody says, "Debye chocolate?" Um, I have not bought a $10 candy bar, so I can't judge it, but I will say the Debye chocolate thing I had at the fair, what was that? De- Debye chocolate cheesecake. Holy crap, that was good. That was wild. But I don't know, a $10 candy bar, it better be bomb. Caviar, haven't ever tried it. I don't think that's one that I'd care to try, all right? The, the... Fish eggs? Isn't that what caviar is, fish eggs? And, I'm gonna go with no thanks on that. No thank... Lamb's brains. "I was really curious to try it out. Found a recipe for fried brains with Parmesan crust." Okay. Um, it's brains, okay? Obviously, it's gonna be disappointing. It's, it's brains, okay? Voodoo Donuts in Portland. Okay, you know what? It's a donut, dude. How bad could a donut be? Now, I, I ain't gonna wait in line for a donut. You, you have to wait in line sometimes at Voodoo Donuts for a long time.

I don't know if there's any donut worth a 45-minute wait, okay? It's a donut. And there are lots of places to get donuts. Oh, crickets. I was talking about eating crickets just last night. Now, I don't know who's expecting crickets to be good. You know, they're, they're crickets, right? So this guy says, "The box they came in said bacon and cheddar flavored, but they tasted just like cardboard. They weren't even gross enough to have a fun story to tell about them." Yeah, crickets, uh, if you don't look at them when you're eating them, they're just crunchy. But I have had the bacon and cheddar flavored, and they... This is correct, they don't taste like bacon and cheddar, nor do the other flavors you can get taste like the flavors they supposedly are. It's like eating a flavorless crouton. But they're not like gross, they're just crunchy.[heavy metal music] Now, I would imagine if they were fresh, it'd be different, but these are cooked crickets. You can get 'em at the gas station and things like that. Not, not too bad. Turducken, no thanks. No thanks. Sounds disgusting. Candy apples, now those are disappointing because they should be chopped up. Have you ever eaten a candy apple that's whole? It's a, it's a terrible eating experience. Now, if you sliced up

apples and covered them in caramel, they're gonna be bomb and they'll, they'll be easy to eat, but candy apples are a terrible treat, all right? Don't anybody ever buy me a candy apple, all right? Not down. Okay, somebody from another country was like, "Oh, Twinkies. I waited forever." Um, Twinkies, nothing special, you know? Maybe if you get those, uh, t- I don't know if they even make 'em anymore, completely chocolate-covered Twinkies or you get the other brand that has a frosting on top. Plain old Twinkie, yeah, not, not very good. Oh, and somebody's always gotta throw Crumbl Cookies under the bus. Get outta here with that. Crumbl Cookies are good. I don't care what anyone says. Yes, they are extremely sugary. Yes, they're extremely rich. They're kinda overpowering, but they're, they're just fine. Don't, don't come at me and be like, "Oh, Crumbl Cookies are gross." You just don't know how to eat sweets, fool. Yeah, you don't know how to eat sweets. All right, I'm gonna take a break. Who knows what other kind of, uh, crap we're gonna eat? We got the, the hot worm coming, coming for noon. [heavy metal music] From time to time, I've heard the ladies complain, you know, "My man, he just don't listen. Why don't you guys listen?" And you think, it's like, "Oh, come on, you know, that's just generalizing." Now we've got scientific proof that men just don't listen. Cats meow at 'em louder. That's [laughs] what I was just reading. That's right, cat articles, you know me. Yeah, apparently they did a long scientific study

and determined that cats are much louder when they're trying to get the attention of a man than a woman, and they believe it's because men just don't listen. [laughs] I'll tell you, my cats meow at me loud. Oh. They can be just pests.

Now, I used to just have one loud cat, Koopa. He's loud. But, you know, since Becca moved in, she's got Chris, and Chris is equally as loud if not louder.

So occasionally, they'll both want food at the same time, and it is mayhem. [meowing] Oh. And then you got the dog that starts barking or they're whining. At least the other two cats are pretty quiet. They just kinda grumble at each other. I'll tell you what, it, it is a bizarre zoo in my home nowadays. [laughs] It's just plain crazy. But, oh, there you go. Men don't listen, as proven by cats. All right, quick break. I'm gonna chug more coffee. Back in a minute with some other kinda crap. Eh, you know, you know the content I pull up. Garbage. [heavy metal music] Well, hopefully the rest of the day continues to go by quickly. I hope your morning's going good. Again, don't forget to get out and vote. If you're in Idaho Falls or Pocatello, it's easy. Super easy. It'll take like two minutes. You only have to vote for two candidates. Bring yourself a, uh,

proof of residency, some kinda piece of mail and your ID. If you're not registered, they'll get you registered at the polls, and you can vote.

One of us has to dis- has to, uh, disagree, so it's not easy. It's very annoying.

[laughs] It's so hard.

Very stupid.

So hard.

No one cares.

[laughs]

[laughs]

Well, I pulled up this post, post, Peaches, and you might find this funny. "Am I a jerk for jokingly insulting my friend's dog?" [laughs] So-

I mean, it's better than, like, their girlfriend or something.

[laughs] Well, yeah, I guess, uh,

if, you know, somebody's girlfriend walked into the frame on a video call and you were like, "Who's that stinky little baby?" [laughs]

[laughs]

It might be kinda rude. [laughs] But yeah, I guess this person got very, very upset that someone asked that question, "Who's that little stinky baby?" Come on now.

That's not, that's not bad at all.

That's not that bad. Yeah. She bu- she, like, freaked out. So, uh, you know, the person ended up apologizing. She's like, "You know what? If you can't respect my dog, we shouldn't even be friends."

Oh.

And then she hung up on her. [laughs] I mean, I call Becca's dog crazy all the time.

I thought we were just gonna call Becca stinky or something like that. [laughs]

No. [laughs] No.

Poor Becca. [laughs]

No. [laughs] I might call her crazy too every once in a while, but, [laughs] you know? I, I don't think that, uh, any girl who would actually want to be with me would be completely sane.

Mm-hmm.

You gotta be a little bit crazy. [laughs] Oh. Yeah, um, I don't know, I v- I think if somebody insulted my cat, they'd have to say something really mean or, like, kick 'em or something, then I'd, you know, be offended. But just be like, "Look at that stinky little Koopa," I'd be like, "Yeah, he is. You know, he's been stinking up the house. That's why I gotta shampoo the carpets. He's a bad boy."

But... I would've been really sad if somebody insulted Mia like that.

[rock music] Mia?

Yeah, Mia was my favorite.

Yeah, well, I, I would insult her. Like [laughs], look at her, she's nuts.

[laughs]

[laughs]

Mia was so adorable.

Just twitch.

The other cats were so afraid of me, then Mia just hobbles up and meows and wants pets.

That's what she did. She'd hobble and twitch-

[laughs]

... and she was crazy. [laughs]

She was an old lady.

[laughs]

She was, like, 20 years old, wasn't she?

Yeah, I think she was, uh, 22 when we finally had to put her to sleep. And she probably would've lived forever. She just, you know, got to the point she couldn't even step into the litter box.

Yeah, you can't, you can't-

Yeah

... have a cat that old. You can't have any-

No

... pet that old. It's, it's, it's sad.

Yeah.

Once- Once Rover became just useless, it, it was really terrible.

Yeah, it, it, it was sad. Well...

We had to carry him up the stairs and everything, and he was just... You could tell his eyes were all grayed o- glazed over-

Mm-hmm

... and gray and cloudy and...

Well, there was that one time she got under the back deck, and there's a window down there into the basement. And the window well's probably only about, you know, a foot, foot and a half tall? And she fell into it.

Aw.

And she couldn't get out, so I had to go into the basement bedroom, and the screen was, like, built into the window. I had to rip the screen out to get her out of there, and I don't even know how you can repair this window. So now I just have to keep it shut-

Speaking of windows-

... all the time

... have you looked outside?

Don't... No one tell me that. Don't... Uh-uh.

Uh-huh. Mm-hmm.

Oh, Peaches.

It, it is.

No. No, it's not! Is it bad?

Uh...

Or is it just light? It's light. Is it sticking to the ground? It's sticking to cars. It's sticking to cars, but not- But not too much ... not to the ground? Okay. All right.

It's not. It- It looks like it's melting pretty fast. Okay.

But it is, it is happening.

I hate that. You just ruined my day!

I, I'm not, I'm not happy about it either.

[laughs]

I'm honestly r- very scared-

[laughs]

... compared to last winter.

Yeah?

Because ever since that one kid that rear-ended my car, I'm now terrified.

[laughs] Peaches afraid to drive anywhere in the snow. Typical California. [laughs]

Well, I, I was doing just fine before that, but...

Yeah.

Then that happened and...

Did you get your snow tires on yet?

Oh, they, they're on.

Okay.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I, I know when I, uh, got rear-ended and then I had to drive the rental car, which did not have snow tires-

Mm-hmm

... and I was driving that Chevy Malibu down Sunnyside, and I was at one point just, like, completely sideways.

Yeah, um, I know my truck can kinda suck. I mean, I'm, I'm not gonna change the tires or anything, but, uh, if it gets bad enough, I gotta put it in, like, four-wheel drive or it'll slide all over the place. So, it's the other drivers you gotta be aware of. And if some idiot plows into you 'cause they don't know how to drive in the snow, call our friends at The Advocates Injury Attorneys, uh, who I believe Ben is gonna be coming in on Friday to assist with our big, uh, prize announcement-

Yeah

... that we're gonna be doing, so.

I know you guys were wondering what happened to the guitar. Uh, Matt-

Oh, you gave away what it was.

Oh.

That's okay. [laughs] You didn't say who signed it, though.

Well, yeah. Matty just ripped it open for the, the pre-roll.

Yeah, I thought we'd be letting the listener open it. I mean, I guess-

Well, I think they're gonna rewrap it. [laughs]

Oh, are they? They're gonna rewrap it?

I think so, yeah.

Are we gonna say who's on it, or keep it a Christmas surprise?

We can have Ben reveal it.

We could. It's a big band. Well-

Multiple

... I mean, there's multiple big bands on there. But one's, like, real big right now, so it's a- it's a good... It's probably our best guitar as far as, uh, the lineup that's on it.

It took a long time for us to get this whole thing signed-

Mm-hmm

... with all these different bands 'cause I don't know when the big one signed it. The-

Didn't you bring it?

Was that from me back in, like, 2023?

Yeah, when you and me and Ben were at that show?

Yeah.

I think that was you who got it signed. 'Cause that was that day I was sick. And-

Well, yeah, 'cause you went to, uh, Sleep Token and then-

The day before

... drove from Boise to Salt Lake.

Mm-hmm. And I think you interviewed a member of the band at that show, right?

I did.

Yes. So that's when it got signed. So-

I was really worried that it was gonna get canceled because of the vocal issues.

Ah, that's right. I forgot about that. Forgot about that. Lot of, lot of crud going around this time of year, people. But we've got a big, fun announcement we'll do during Traffic School Friday, kicking off at 8:45. As far as I know, Ben will be here. Uh, if he doesn't show up, maybe we'll do the announcement at 10:00, I guess. Playing it by ear. But we've got a big, fun giveaway coming up just in time for Christmas. And, I mean, I, I wish that, uh, I could take that, that guitar right there. It'd look real nice on my wall.

Me too. I have zero. [laughs]

Uh, you got, uh, zero guitars?

Yeah.

Well, you have one guitar, don't you? An acoustic guitar?

Nope.

You got rid of it?

Uh, uh, oh, I have one acoustic that's not signed.

Yeah. No, I just meant a guitar.

No, I have a legitimate ax that's signed by Ice Nine Kills. Other than-

That's true

... that, I have nothing.

Ah. Well, can't have that one. It's gotta go to a listener, just like all our other awesome prizes.

That's until you hear... You see a pseudonym that's kinda-

[laughs]

... you know, Brad Boil-

[laughs]

... popping up on the [laughs], on the prize sheet.

Well, everybody, that's the end of the program today. Peaches and I'll be back at noon for the noon hour of madness and mayhem and-

Make sure to go vote.

Make sure to go vote. It's easy, but drive safely. You know, apparently it's... Ugh.

It's wet.

Outside. It's wet outside, so drive with caution and watch out for idiots. And if some idiot smashes into you, call The Advocates Injury Attorneys who are teamed up with us on this giveaway we're gonna announce on Friday. All right. Bye. [instrumental music] Thank you again for tuning in to the Victor Wilt Show. This program's a production of Riverbend Media Group. To contact the show or for more information, hit us up at riverbendmediagroup.com.