#0163 - G.G. Allin’s Bloodstained Underwear, and Other Collectibles. - 02/26/2025

0:00 - Fixing a song issue that would actually have been hilarious to leave broken
2:22 - What's your most shallow dating requirement?
8:50 - Insults that don't have any swearing
11:58 - Fake cowboys and corrupt small towns
14:12 - Ring notification says a husky ate the neighbors
15:43 - We are giving away all kinds of prizes
16:43 - Toilet paper love story, doomsday bunker full of seeds, gold bar scam, man arrested for "odd behavior" with a Chucky doll
22:08 - UFOs and "reclining" your seat on an airplane
25:50 - Call about good UFO pictures
27:44 - Trying to get Jade to buy me stuff,
31:31 - Why you should get your pets spayed or neutered
36:13 - Talking about the website and merch I'm working on
40:40 - Bloody underwear and hair for sale
43:03 - Facebook owes me two bucks.

Viktor Wilt kicks off the show by immediately blaming Peaches for something—classic start. A scheduling mistake almost led to country music playing on KBear, which would have sent listeners into a full-blown existential crisis. Luckily, disaster was averted, but Viktor still had to fix Peaches’ "fix" because, as it turns out, fixing something once doesn’t mean actually fixing it.

Then, Viktor takes a deep dive into shallow dating requirements, where people reveal the pettiest reasons they won’t date someone—like having an outie belly button or walking the wrong way. Viktor questions if he's also shallow for needing proper spelling and grammar in texts, but ultimately decides that’s just common decency.

Next, it’s time for G-rated insults, because not every insult needs to be NSFW. Gems include "You're unpleasant to be around" and "You're hard to underestimate." However, Viktor remains unimpressed—some things just need swear words for full impact. A listener then defends "All hat, no cattle" as a solid insult, leading Viktor into a rant about fake cowboys like Jason Aldean, who probably couldn’t survive a single week in a real small town.

The Neighborhood Watch report gets weird when someone posts an alert about a murderous husky. They meant to say the dog killed chickens, but the way it was worded? Full-on Cujo vibes. Viktor calls fake news on the idea that a single husky went on a murder spree without anyone noticing.

Over in Freak News, a woman gets a toilet paper tattoo to commemorate the aisle where she met her soulmate (romantic?), a guy gets scammed into wrapping $80,000 worth of gold bars in Christmas paper and handing them to a “federal agent” in a grocery store parking lot (genius), and another man gets arrested for weird behavior with a Chucky doll at a supermarket (thankfully, not that kind of weird behavior). Viktor also stumbles upon a truly disgusting auction featuring G.G. Allin’s bloodstained tighty-whities and Kurt Cobain’s hair—because apparently, people have too much money and no sense of shame.

Meanwhile, Jade shows up to offer his usual deep wisdom ("Just play more music, Viktor"), while Viktor reveals that Facebook owes him a whopping $1.98, which he tragically forfeited by not setting up his payout account. He mourns the loss of his sweet, sweet $2.
As the show wraps up, Viktor prepares for another noon-hour session of who-knows-what, hoping the day blazes by so he can go home and do nothing. Just another day of radio mayhem!

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#0163 - G.G. Allin’s Bloodstained Underwear, and Other Collectibles. - 02/26/2025
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