Traffic School - 09/12/2025

Ah, the cops are here. I didn't expect to have to see your face today. What's going on?

I tell you, I love surprise visits.

I know. I'm trying to load up my stuff to get ready to go to-

Your stuff, that's exactly what I wanna talk about. When I pulled in, you were in the back alley. What was that all about?

Don't worry about what's in my duffle bag, okay?

[laughs]

I know it's a big duffle bag.

Oh, your eyes were big as grapefruits.

Oh, it's the cops.

[laughs]

And I'm stuffing it in the station vehicle.

[laughs]

I figure that's a good way to transport and be a, you know, a little bit, uh, w- what's the word I'm looking here? Sneaky.

Yeah, it's like, the part I liked is when you looked over at Jay and you said, "Hey, is the neighbors burning some alfalfa over there?"

[laughs]

"What's that smell?" [laughs]

[laughs] Don't look in the bag, officer.

[laughs] You can't look in the bag, that's what you say. You can't.

I know my rights.

[laughs]

You got a warrant? Check my K-Bear bag?

You can't pat me down.

[laughs]

[laughs]

Yes, I will be broadcasting live at Walmart in Chubbok for Idaho Preferred. You know, just, uh-

Absolutely

... promoting them Idaho goods.

Yes, sir.

That's right.

And I think you're gonna be surprised. There's a lot more than potatoes that come out of this great state.

That's what I've heard. Um-

[laughs] See the face.

[laughs] I guess I'm gonna find out what else.

You're well knowledge on it, I can see that.

As long as they ain't Idaho peaches.

[laughs]

Want nothing to do with that.

[laughs]

[laughs] Uh, so how's your week been?

Uh, well, it was gonna be real good. You know, I was, I was gonna be on a Harley ride and that got canceled. I'm afraid of rain, a little bit of rain. I didn't think it'd hurt anybody but, uh, yeah, it got canceled. So I thought, well, what can I do to make my day? Go ruin Victor's [laughs].

And you're wearing a Freddy Krueger shirt and everything.

[laughs]

[laughs] Halloween's, you know, a ways away. You don't gotta come in and try to scare me, you know, extra bad. It's bad enough I had to unexpectedly see your face.

[laughs]

[laughs] So you listeners ready for some Traffic School: Powered by The Advocates?

Ooh, hey, that brings something up. I know one listener that is not very happy with you.

Oh, really?

Yeah, yeah. Well-

W- what's their problem?

... that- that's odd about that, right? What's their problem? I, I ended up going out to Victor, or not Victor. Geez. I went out to Victor [laughs].

That's the best named town in, in East Idaho, so.

Where did I go yesterday?

I don't know. Uh, where'd you, where ... Oh, you said Spencer.

Spencer, that's where I-

That's right.

[laughs]

You already told me and I already forgot.

So I go out to the Spencer Bar and Grill yesterday on a little four-wheeler ride since I didn't get to go on the Harley, and the, uh, owner was like, "Where's Victor? He hasn't come out and tasted one of my burgers yet. And I'm telling you, Victor, they're the best."

You know, and what's Spencer, about an hour?

Sure.

Hour drive or so?

Depends on how daring you are [laughs].

[laughs] Well, you know, I know you guys are out in full force.

Yeah.

So, i- is it this weekend you said to avoid Rexburg, or was that last weekend?

It's right now, and when I come in today, traffic was backed up about a mile to two miles on the south exit and about a half a mile on the middle exit. It is crowded. If you don't have to go up there, stay away, at least 'til this afternoon.

Okay. 'Cause you were trying to convince me to come up there this-

[laughs]

... today [laughs]. I'm like, wait a minute, I seem to recall a good reason to not go to Rexburg.

And when you talk Walmart, don't go to that one, 'cause they won't have anything for sale.

Oh yeah, no, come to the Chubbok Walmart-

[laughs] And see Victor

... from 11:00 AM to 1:00 PM, broadcasting live. I have the big bag of stuff-

What-

... that Lieutenant Crane saw

... all you guys that are driving want to avoid the traffic, stop in Chubbok, go to Walmart, meet Victor-

Yeah

... and then come on up.

All right. It's gonna be a good time and here in about, uh, three minutes, we're gonna kick off Traffic School: Powered by The Advocates, so get those questions ready. 208-535-1015, the number to call. We need your help to make this program work.

And if you are going to Rexburg, please be patient. You are gonna be in some traffic today. Just be patient.

See, every time I've left town recently, I've gotten stuck on the freeway. I, I don't know what the deal is. I tried to go to Pokey one day a couple weeks ago, you know, there's an accident.

That's about your lifestyle. One time, two weeks ago I tried to do something [laughs]-

Yeah. Yeah. Then, then I'm trying to take Peaches to the airport. He's melting down 'cause there's another accident, we're stuck on the Highway 20. I'm like, Peaches, just settle down please. I'm trying to drive.

I know where that crash was. You should've told him, "Get out and walk. Your legs are long enough, you'll beat us there."

Well, he did threaten to get out, and I should've been like, "Go."

[laughs] Like, "You get."

But I, I didn't know if it would be appropriate to, you know, run through the scene of an accident.

[laughs]

Seems, uh, inappropriate to me, so I was like, "Just settle down, we'll find another way." And boy, it was a long 45-minute drive-

[laughs]

... from my house to the Idaho Falls Airport that day.

[laughs]

I'm, I'm afraid to leave town. Every time I go, I just get parked.

Your problems, your problem child.

Parked on the highway or freeway. I know, it's annoying. You know, I got no patience.

[laughs]

That's why I don't live in the big city, all right? So I don't have to put up with this kind of crap.

[laughs]

When are we gonna get that road between Blackfoot and Idaho Falls, I-15 expanded to three lanes? I don't see any work going on out there.

[laughs] You obviously haven't traveled it, because there's been construction going on forever, all summer.

Sure, from Blackfoot to Pokey.

[laughs]

You know where I get stuck? Between Blackfoot and Idaho Falls. ITD, come on. Use that tax dollar.

You need a George Jetson jetpack.

I, you know, I'm, I'm thinking about buying a helicopter with all my riches.

Yeah.

[laughs] Yeah.

Yeah.

You ever seen me fly a helicopter?

No, I have not [laughs].

Y- me either. It, it wouldn't be good. All right, everybody, we'll take a quick break and then you call us, dang it. 208-535-1015, the number to call for Traffic School: Powered by The Advocates. We'll be right back.[Music] 208-535-1015, the number to call for Traffic School powered by the Advocates. Come on and call us with your questions. I forgot to make a post online for online questions, so we really need people to call.

Yeah.

Oh, wh- what's wrong? I don't know how to turn on your mic?

[laughs]

Doing a bad job?

That- that's a great job. I love to just hear you.

Uh, well, you're like most people then.

[laughs]

[laughs] All right, uh, we talked about the fact that you should just avoid Rexburg today, yeah.

If at all possible.

If... I know it's tough. I know it's tough. It's the, you know-

You're craving.

I- you just wanna get over there and... I dunno, what do you do in Rexburg?

[laughs]

[laughs]

You can't skateboard.

Is that illegal in Rexburg?

I don't know. [laughs]

I- I just would assume, "There's kids having fun."

[laughs]

What is happening?

Shut it down.

[laughs] All right, let's go to the phones. K-Bear, you are live on Traffic School, powered by the Advocates. Who's this?

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!

Yeah! [laughs]

How you guys doing?

[laughs] It's almost fall time.

Oh, yeah. What- what- what're you drive in the fall, Carl?

[laughs]

What do you take to the car show?

Right. Oh, taking that Pinto, man, that '76 Pinto with a 454 in the hood. Oh, yeah. [laughs]

Nice. Carl messaged me and said he's gonna come see me at the live broadcast at the Chubbuck Walmart from 11 to 1:00.

Oh, boy, that's something to look forward to. [laughs]

That's right. [laughs]

Oh, yeah.

Gonna be a party.

[laughs]

Hi. Bring- bring- bring your earplugs, you might need them.

Vroom, vroom [laughs], I'm Carl!

[laughs] You're gonna be st-... Are you gonna be outside or inside?

I don't know. I have, uh, no information on that.

If- if you're standing-

Yeah

... outside, you're gonna hear this little Pinto going vroom, vroom.

[laughs]

I'm Carl. Hey, I'm Carl.

[laughs]

[laughs] Oh, oh man.

Oh.

Oh, my word. [sniffs] Yeah, so, uh, uh, last week you guys were talking about elderly drivers, and-

And we didn't mean to offend you, Carl. [laughs]

[laughs]

No, no, no. Yeah, right, right, right, right. So, I mean, it's- it is- it's kind of an important question to me, so, um-

Yeah, it's right there

... [laughs] I mean, uh, long story short, my grandfather, uh, he had an optometrist friend that he would go to and he would just sign the thing and he'd take that into the DMV. And he did that for years. And I don't know if you guys remember the South Park episode or The Country Kitchen? I- it was totally like that. I mean, it was in 2017 when people were plowing into farmer's markets and stuff.

[laughs]

And [laughs] we're trying- we're trying to get the keys from grandpa, and he's sitting there going, "Well, I've been driving for 65 years and it's my right." And I'm like, "It's not a right, it's a privilege." And so if you have somebody in your family that is ready to retire off the road, they're getting a little dangerous, uh, is there any legal precedence that my kids can take to pry my keys away when it's time for me to go?

[laughs]

That's actually a good question.

Uh, probably all they'd have to do-

Yeah

... is go take the negative battery cable off your battery and [laughs] you'd be shut down.

[laughs]

Right. I mean, you know... [laughs] I mean, you- you can let the air out of the tires, but he's probably gonna drive it anyway, right?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[laughs]

Oh, man. My daughter one time, she was a young girl, she was... Goes to take a little pickup we had, it was a run around pickup, uh, down to go swimming and she loaded these tubes in. And next thing you know, I come back, it's got a flat tire. And I go in the house and she's got a big old lump on her left elbow. And I'm like, "What the heck happened to you?"

[laughs]

She's like, "Oh my gosh, that little pickup's so hard to drive, I don't know what's wrong with it." So I brought it back and I said, "It has a flat tire."

[laughs]

Oh. [laughs]

[laughs] Throwing your daughter under the bus on there.

[laughs]

Oh. [laughs]

Oh, that's funny. But no, th-

Oh, man.

What- what you do on that, Carl, is, uh, like we spoke last- last week, you go out to the ITD website, there's a form out there you can submit. And they'll contact him and retest him.

Right, right. Yeah. But I mean-

So once- once they take their driver's license away, if we make a traffic stop, if you just call and say, "Hey, Pops is still driving even though we took his driver's license away-"

Right.

... we go make a traffic stop and we'd be the bearer of bad news. Now that is-

Right

... when you get a butt chewing [laughs]

Oh, man.

[laughs]

Cops on me.

Not from them. The cops get to chewing, right?

[laughs]

You... Back to what Carl said about, "I've been driving 75 years," you know? [laughs]

[laughs] Oh, man. Y'all remember that-

You mind your own business, pup. [laughs]

Right. [laughs] Y'all remember, there's- there's a story of this guy in England, he was 75 years old or something like that, and he had never had a driver's license before. And that's a pretty good run for not getting pulled over.

[laughs]

I don't know. I mean, you know... I mean-

But all you really gotta do is obey the laws.

Yeah.

Right.

Pretty much.

You know? Yeah. You know? I mean, you ain't riding dirty, you ain't got nothing to worry about, right?

[laughs]

[laughs] Hey, speaking of that, don't get too close to Victor's vehicle while you're down there. I do not trust you're what he put in it.

Yeah, don't- don't-

Oh

... worry about my duffle bags, man.

[laughs]

Yeah, no-

Go check the camper's bag, Carl

... no, there's nothing in there. [laughs]

[laughs]

No doubt. All right on, right on.

He's peddling some stuff down there. [laughs]

I- I got-

Right? Right?

... what I call hats. [laughs]

[laughs]

Nice. Nice.

You got a quarter inch-

Oh, man

... drive down there?

Oh.

You got a quarter inch wrench? [laughs]

[laughs]

That's right. Give me a- about three stickers.

[laughs]

Yeah.

Oh, God.

The cops are never gonna figure this out.

They're never figuring out my codes.

Oh, they love stickers.

[laughs]

No, they're not into drugs, they love stickers. [laughs]

That's right.

No. [laughs] Oh, man. Oh, you guys crack me up. Oh, man. Right on. Hey, uh, quick- quick plug, we're doing a Toys for Tot toy drive.

[laughs]

Uh, so a quick... [laughs] Uh, Thomas Meadows with Idaho Bassheads. Uh, the railroad parking lot behind the first Nash. Uh, you can bring a toy. Enter your car. Uh...... bring a $10 toy, and, uh, there's lots of, uh, stuff to raffle off. There's prizes, awards. And, uh, it all goes for a good cause. And, uh... I mean, you can't start too early with the Toys for Tots, you know? I mean, it's, uh-

And the, and the reason Victor let this happen is 'cause we're both scared of the Marines. [laughs]

That's right. We ain't messing with the Marine-

[laughs]

No. [laughs] I went to the Marine Corps boot camp one time. Those guys are intense. [laughs]

[laughs] That's right, they are. [laughs] I know, I know.

Car- uh, when is, when is that happening, Carl?

Uh, that's tomorrow, uh, from 10:00, 10:00 to 3:00 in the, uh, railroad parking lot. Uh, it's over there by the Bourbon Barrel, uh-

Yeah

... First Nash Bourbon Barrel. Yeah, that old railroad parking lot right there.

All right.

And, uh, we're hoping to get 80 cars and as many toys as we can fill that box with. Yep. And, uh, cash donations accepted. Uh, like I said, it's going for a great cause. So yeah, come on out and, uh, hear some heavy bass heads. Uh, those, those cars are unbelievable. I, uh... Thomas Meadows, I rode in his truck and I was like, "Dude, you gotta turn the stereo down, man. I had a kidney stone when I came in here. I don't need more."

[laughs]

That thing is so loud. It really rattles your kidneys out, man. No doubt. No doubt.

Awesome, man. Well, it's, it's-

Right on. Yeah. No, it should be a good time.

Yeah, hope the event goes good.

Well, sweet. [laughs]

10:00 to 3:00 tomorrow.

Yeah.

Toys for Tots donations.

Yeah, sure.

And, uh, thanks for the-

Yep

... letting us know about that, Carl.

Right on, right on. Well, sweet. Well, hey, I'll see you at Walmart about 11:30, pulling up in that '76 Pinto, man.

[laughs] Sounds good, man. I'll be there.

[laughs] All right. We'll see you soon, man.

All right. See you, Carl.

Bye.

KBear, you're live on Traffic School, powered by The Advocates. Who's this?

This is Adam.

Adam, what's up, dude?

Uh, man, s- I've been watching more body cam videos. I know it's questionable decision, but I've done it.

[laughs]

So my question now is like, I'll watch these videos and these drunk idiots or whatever will ask for a supervisor, and one will show up. Please tell me that that's not the policy, that everyone can pull the ultimate Karen move.

No, no. They can request. If there's not one available, we just go on about our business and, uh... And if you wanna file a complaint, we'll definitely fi- uh, follow up on it later.

And when they, when they ask for a supervisor, is it just like a sergeant, or do they pull some desk jockey like you away?

[laughs]

No, we are... Our field supervisors can handle anything. And so that would be our sergeant corps. Yeah.

Oh, be like a sergeant.

Yep.

Yeah. Okay. All right. That was, that was all I got this week.

Yeah.

Hopefully someone else can suck up some time for y'all.

[laughs] Oh, yeah. They're, they're gonna call, aren't you, people? 'Cause if you don't, you suck. [laughs] That's right. If you don't participate in Traffic School, you suck. You're gonna be sentenced to time with Carl and Victor and Chubby. [laughs] That's right, at Walmart. [laughs] And cover my shift.

You can make them... You can make them listen to Peaches complain about something.

There we go. You will have to listen to Peaches Pit Party the entire show.

Got it.

Well, appreciate the call, Adam, and hope you have a good one.

Yeah, have a good one.

Right on. See yeah. 208-535-1015, the number to call for Traffic School, powered by The Advocates. KBear, you're live on the show. Who's this?

Troublemaker.

Troublemaker, what's up, man?

Oh, I figured I'd burn up a little bit of your time for you.

[laughs]

So, uh-

Everybody's got pity points tonight.

It's the train, so it's like a mess.

For heaven's sake. Yeah, you guys suck. We're doing our best.

So, yeah. [laughs]

We're doing our best to carry you. [laughs]

[laughs]

Is, is your, um, p- um, patrol unit gray or black?

I drive a black car.

Oh, okay. All right.

This car is great.

I've see- I s- I seen a, I seen a undercover roll through a, a red light, you know, with his lights on and everything. As soon as he got through, they shut him off. So... But it was a great one, so...

Well, he had to be somewhere.

I was like, "Ah!"

[laughs] His, his hair appointment was overdue. [laughs]

[laughs] Yeah.

You don't wanna upset those gals at the salon.

I understand that. I'm just jealous.

[laughs] Well- Why do you do that? 'Cause I can. [laughs] Yeah, I don't think they'll give us all the information on their undercover vehicles. [laughs] That's it. They don't want us to know for some reason. [laughs]

Yeah, yeah.

We need to go like Hawaii and have a blue light on anytime we're in service. There you go. [laughs]

[laughs]

Well, thanks, Troublemaker.

Uh, my boss had his decals on his truck removed so he would, uh, quit getting calls about it.

[laughs] Yeah. That's what we need to do with the station vehicle wrap. Just take it off. [laughs]

[laughs]

Well, thanks, Troublemaker, and hope you have an awesome weekend, man.

Yeah, you guys too.

Right on.

Yeah.

See ya. KBear, you're live on Traffic School, powered by The Advocates. Who's this?

This is Craig.

Craig, what's up?

Not much. Hey, I got a question. Uh, took a ride with, uh, a group of guys. We did, uh, a ride on our, on our bi- dirt bikes.

We kind of got lost. We wound up, uh,

like, probably five miles

farther than the Swan Valley turnoff. So we had to ride all the way back to Swan Valley, off to the side of the road. We got to that store, and then we went up the road to head to Victor. That's where our, our trailers and, and trucks were parked. But we had to... We jammed all the way up the road to the top of the mountain where the snowmobile lot is. I'm just curious what your reaction would have been if you had seen us doing that. We were getting crazy or anything. We were trying to be respectful, stay off to the side of the road. But after about a 51-mile ride in the mountains, uh, where we got kind of turned around and lost, uh, we had no option. We were already low on gas. And we made it back up, but we spent a good 15 miles-... um, right off to the side, right off the side of the- the paved road heading all the way back up to the top of the mountain.

What would you have done?

All depends on- all depends on what brand you're riding. [laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs] Well, I know you would have pulled over the Suzukis. You see that stuff.

Yeah, they're done. They're done. No, uh-

No.

Uh, you know what? Common sense would tell you that you guys are being respectful, you're going to get there. I don't think there's anybody that's going to bother you. Now, if you're pulling wheelies down the road, and w- sw- even swerving in and out of traffic, that's going to be an issue. But, hey, we just come out. It's obviously, we were, we're all geared up. We just had a ride. We got lost. I think pretty much anybody's going to understand that and get you back up to your trailer.

Well, that's, see, that's mighty cool of you guys. Uh, I can't, I can't promise you that we weren't doing wheelies on the road. [laughs]

[laughs] So...

It was an adventure. We were all pretty much tore up, 'cause it was a, probably a nine out of 10 ride.

Oh, yeah.

Towards Verdi.

Yep.

Yeah. It, it was awesome, but, you know, kind of felt a little guilty being on the road, but really couldn't do much about it. I didn't want to go back through that hell.

We got a little-

The kids went through.

We got a little place where we can ride in the winter, our dirt bikes. Uh, we can go down and ride in the winter. And took some friends down. I told them, "Hey, listen, they let us ride in town here to get to the trails. We couldn't leave from the house, so mind your Ps and Qs. Don't do anything stupid." We no more drive out on the main road, and one of the guys picks a wheelie up and starts wheeling down the street, thinking he's awesome. And I ride up the side of him [laughs]

[laughs]

... until they pull over. I'm like, "This is what ruins it for everybody else." You know?

Yeah.

Kinda like this guy I heard about riding a motorized bike in St. Anthony.

Yeah. [laughs]

[laughs] Like, "Jerk."

Yeah, I get that. Yeah, we were, uh, we were to that point though. We, you know, we could have gotten pulled over, but, uh, we got lucky. Made it back, and everybody was safe. So... No, I, I appreciate all of you guys in uniform. You're awesome. And, uh, you probably don't get thanked enough, but thank you for your service.

Appreciate it, and, uh, I... Sorry I missed that call for the invite to go dirt biking. [laughs]

[laughs] Yeah, you-

Hey-

... you want to bring, bring a guy with who's gonna pop wheelies and get you in trouble-

[laughs]

... I, I might know one in this room.

Well, I'll tell you what. Buy a snow kit, and you'll be invited every weekend, 'cause we do a lot of snow biking.

Oh, I just don't think I can do that quite yet in my life. [laughs]

[laughs] Not yet?

Hey, 16-

Or maybe a little too late?

No, I still enjoy my snowmobile too much.

Ah, gotcha.

61 years old, and we, we get pretty crazy heading up the mountain. We leave you snowmobilers down at the bottom because you can't make it.

[laughs] Oh.

[laughs] You can't make it, old man. [laughs]

[laughs]

Oh, pretty funny.

Sounds like a challenge.

All right, guys. Well, yep. There you go. Have a good weekend, and thank you for your time.

Hey, thanks, man. You have a good weekend as well.

You bet. Bye-bye.

See ya. 208-535-1015, the number to call for Traffic School, powered by the advocates. Um, I have a question.

[laughs]

And, um-

This is great

... this, this might be surprising, but I got irritated by another driver yesterday.

No way.

Yeah. You know, I'm pulling onto Sunnyside, and, uh, some guy just... You know, he was a long ways down there, so I pull out. He's just flying up on me, whips around me through the intersection. Clearly, going over the speed limit. And, uh, I would have called him in, but he had his, uh, a cover, like a tinted cover over his license plate.

Oh.

Yeah. Is it legal to cover your license plate in any way?

Oh. You know what? I might be responsible for a divorce, because I got this same exact call about a week ago. And the husband and wife were in disagreement on whether there could be any kind of cover over the license plate or not.

The husband said there could be. The wife said there couldn't.

Hmm.

Yeah. And-

Hmm

... she did not let that go that I said, "You were right, ma'am. He is wrong." [laughs]

[laughs] It can't even be clear, right?

No. No kind of cover.

No cover at all.

Yeah.

This one was tinted so dark. I mean, you couldn't read the license plate.

And now you can buy black plates, so they look really nice. You don't have to tint them. They look nice.

I know, but they cost too much.

[laughs]

You know? Taking all my money. I wanted those black plates, but yeah. I ain't got that kind of dough.

[laughs] I haven't got there yet. They're expensive, huh?

Yeah. And they, they, they're a little... And I don't remember exactly how much, but they, I think they're the most expensive license plate.

Like $3 more than the other? [laughs]

No, it was a significant amount. [laughs]

[laughs]

So much that my cheap self, I was like, "Nope, I'll stick with the plain old, you know, red, white and blue Idaho potatoes," whatever.

As unpatriotic as I am. [laughs]

I get the cheapest one possible. That's how I roll.

[laughs]

You guys take enough of my money. [laughs]

[laughs] I'm glad you didn't add in there, "Hard earned money."

Oh, you don't know how hard I work down there.

[laughs]

I mean, look at me. Look at what I'm doing.

Yeah. I ask you, "Hey, you want to do something after work today?" You're like, "Yeah, I don't think so. I've worked five days." [laughs]

[laughs] I know. All I want to do is sit in my recliner and watch a movie.

I love that answer.

[laughs]

"No. Yeah, I'm getting off early today. I think I'm gonna take a nap." [laughs]

[laughs] I, I wonder if I can get off early today.

Yeah. "Hey, do you want to do something fun?" "No, I think I'm going straight home." [laughs]

'Cause I got to spend, you know, two hours of my day sitting in the car-

[laughs]

... on the freeway, driving to the Chubbok Walmart, where I'm gonna be broadcasting live from 11:00 to 1:00 today.

I've never heard anybody want so much to make extra money.

It's not enough extra money.

[laughs]

I talked to Jade about this recently, and he-

[laughs]

You know, I, I talked to him about this months ago. I'm like, "Talent fee should be heftier, all right?"

Who are you taking that's got talent? [laughs]

So, if the boss man's listening, I think our talent fees are on the low end as far as the business goes.

And I think we can get some callers to agree with that. [laughs]

The talent's on the low end as well, but- [laughs]

[laughs]

... come on. It's 2025. Groceries are expensive.

Do they have some courses they could send you to, like I- Idaho State Police? We have to take 40 hours training every two years to stay...... up to snuff, right?

Mm-hmm.

Is there, is there anything we can do to [laughs] help you out? I mean, is there anything we can send you to?

I'm the guy who trains everybody.

[laughs] That's so-

I'm the, I'm the professional. You know, they send people to me.

And that's why we wonder where... [laughs]

[laughs] That's how we end up with peaches. [laughs]

[laughs]

208-535-1015, the number to call for Traffic School, powered by The Advocates. Trying to think if anything else irritated me on the roads recently.

[laughs]

But, uh, we'll take this caller, I guess, first. K-Bear, you're live on the show. Who's this?

Hey, this is Jordan.

Jordan, what's up, dude?

Hey, I was just won- I had a question.

This is the place, perfect. [laughs]

[laughs] Yeah. Hey, so is it illegal for the talent fee to be so low?

It should be.

[laughs]

It's not enough. Not enough when you don't get paid for the driving portion.

[laughs] Well, yeah, I figure this would-

It boils down to being-

... be the perfect place to ask the question for you.

You might as well get my-

I am driving a company vehicle on company fuel.

[laughs]

I know, and I'm not getting paid for it.

[laughs] But kind of-

I got work I could be getting done around here. Instead, I'm relaxing and listening to some tunes, you know? [laughs] Just making my normal wage.

There you go. [laughs]

[laughs]

And I'm gonna go back to this caller. "Hey, do you wanna go do something fun this afternoon?" "No, I think I just wanna go home."

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

"I know I'll be doing enough driving."

All right. You guys have a good day. [laughs]

Hey, you w- you as well, man. [laughs] Peace.

[laughs]

All right.

I know, all I do is drive anymore, I swear. And I told ya, I think this was off-air, I get stuck on the freeway everywhere I go. What if I get stuck on the way to Chubbuck Walmart today, where I'm supposed to be from 11:00 to 1:00?

I might be out of bounds, and I probably am, but I'm gonna say it anyway. [laughs]

[laughs]

You've been bragging about you got this new girlfriend, right?

Uh-huh.

She says, "Hey, you wanna do something fun?" You're like, "No, [laughs] I think I just want to go home and sit."

Yeah!

[laughs]

I do! That's what I thought we were gonna do last weekend. We end up driving to, wh- where were we?

[laughs]

It was, uh, Alpine, to go to the Reggae Festival. And then the next day, "Let's go to the fair!"

[laughs]

She's like, "I don't wanna see people!" [laughs]

[laughs]

"I've had enough people."

"I just wanna see the back of my eyes in my recliner."

That's right. Have you ever been to the fair on the final day?

[laughs]

It's a little bit rough. [laughs] Like, "Let's go get some food." "No, let's leave." [laughs]

[laughs]

"We're going to Texas Roadhouse."

Yeah, l- hey, there you go.

Dude, it, that was a perfect night to go to Texas Roadhouse, when everyone's at the fair.

Did you know I had to do some waitres- waitressing there? Waitress? I d- I was a waiter there, I guess is what I wanna say.

[laughs] Waitress, sure. [laughs]

Waitress, whatever I was. Yeah. Man, that's a lot of work. [laughs]

[laughs] Yeah. Being a server at Texas Roadhouse, that would be crazy.

Kristen, if you're listening, you're amazing. That's who I was teamed up with that night. We were doing a fundraiser for the Special Olympics. And, uh, it's amazing how much you go. And she says that she has her little tracker, averages 12 to 15 miles a night.

Wow, 12 to 15 miles? May- maybe that's the kind of job I should be doing-

[laughs]

... the way I've been packing on weight. [laughs] Need to get out of the chair every once in a while. [laughs]

Oh, geez.

Hey, I have been, you know, walking and moving stuff.

I wanted-

I did some of that.

I wanted to tell those people, you know, when I'm on the other side of that, I'm like, "Hey, can I get some more rolls?" [laughs]

[laughs]

And I wanted to be the guy to go, "You've had enough, all right?" [laughs]

[laughs] But that's the best part. Uh, we're, we're giving them way too many free plugs. [laughs]

[laughs]

Well, some of those rolls do sound, uh, pretty good right now.

Ooh, buddy.

Oh, man. Making me hungry.

Right. [laughs]

[laughs] All right, people, 208-535-1015, the number to call for Traffic School, powered by The Advocates. Um, anything else you wanted to get out to the community today on the program? You know, we said, "Don't go to Rexburg!" [laughs]

[laughs] Ever!

Don't do it.

Ever.

Don't go.

And I'll tell you this, the chief of police there, he seems like a really nice guy, but he could put you in a headlock if he wanted to, right?

That's why I don't monkey around in Rexburg.

So don't mess with the man.

No, Rexburg's no place to, uh, trifle.

Ch- Chief Rhodes, he'll fool you. He seems like the nicest guy ever, but if he has to, he'll put you in a headlock, so... [laughs]

Just like me. [laughs]

So, don't go to Rexburg today. Stay out of there. If you are in Rexburg, be patient. Don't try to go to Walmart and get anything today [laughs] 'cause there's nothing on the shelves.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[laughs]

You'd think that Walmart would plan ahead, you know? S- new stock arriving tomorrow, right?

They, I'm, man, it's, you wanna have fun, people watching, go, go there today because it, they're doing the best they can. They've got all the supplies they can. They're trying to reload shelves, but there is just way more people than there is product and space.

That's why you should go to the Chubbuck Walmart today from-

And meet Victor

... 11:00 AM to 1:00 PM, getting paid, you know, a small amount to be there. [laughs]

[laughs] When you average it out. [laughs]

But I, I, I've got, you know, the duffle bag we talked about earlier-

Ah

... loaded up with stickers, as I called them.

[laughs] Order them up, folks.

And I got a few hats-

[laughs]

... and some rolled up shirts. [laughs]

[laughs] I like that. Do you want a rolled up shirt or would you just like a sticker?

[laughs] That's right. [laughs] Oh, I forgot to, I was gonna bring some CDs that I was gonna-

Oh, yeah

... put in the bag too, so I should, I better remember to do that. Maybe, maybe I'll put them in that, uh, box over there that's full of entry forms-

Oh, yeah

... to win tickets to see Mudvayne at the Portneuf Health Trust Amphitheatre. Your favorite band.

Is that this year? [laughs]

[laughs] October 3rd is when that show's going down, and, uh-

Are you going?

Yeah. Yeah, I mean, hopefully it doesn't snow.

You and Ben?

Uh, we'll probably bring Ben along. I w- I would assume. He's in the know.

I hope so, he pays our way here. [laughs]

[laughs] I know.

[laughs]

Ben from the Advocate's Injury Attorneys, who powers Traffic School. Uh, if you have any last minute questions, you better call us with them now, [208] 535-1015 'cause I gotta get ready to drive to Chubbuck-

[laughs] For free!

... where I'm gonna be [laughs]... Yes. [laughs] That's right. Getting paid nothing extra for my driving time.

You folks in Chubbuck, I apologize if he's not nice to you.

[laughs]

You want a po-ta-to, here's a po-ta-to! Now, get outta here!

You v- you get over there and you get some of that Idaho preferred-

[laughs]

... produce! All right? Get some of the Idaho preferred produce.

And then you git! You git out of my face!

You git! Don't talk to me anymore! [laughs]

[laughs]

It j- it should be fun. I haven't been to the, uh, Chubbuck Walmart in quite some time, so... It, what's more fun than Walmart now?

It's probably a lot different than the others.

I would imagine.

[laughs]

You know? I think I recall hearing them say they did some remodeling a year or two ago, but I don't know. Th- since my kids moved away, I don't go to Pokey very often, so I'm happy to see all the Pokey listeners. Gonna be a good time.

Did I, did I share my story with you about Walmart in, uh, Mesa, Arizona?

Um, maybe?

I was with my niece. We went and bought her a headlight for her car to change it out. It was out. I said, "Let's run over to Walmart. We'll get you a headlight." So we do. We're walking out. Lady in front of us had a full shopping cart clear full of stuff, just pushed it out. Security's like, "Hey, ma'am, we need you to stop." She keeps pushing, acts like she can't hear 'em, right? So [laughs] I walk out, put my foot in the front tire.

[laughs]

[laughs]

I said, "You wanna turn around and pay for that?" She's like, "I don't know what you're talking about." And I said, "Might want to leave it here then." [laughs]

[laughs] You never know when there's a plainclothes, on vacation-

[laughs]

... officer who's still gonna do the job. [laughs] Could you go hang out at Winco every once in a while? You know?

Quit stealing the grapes!

Yeah. You need to, you know, w- 'cause you can't take, uh, beer through the self-checkout anymore because of thieves. So you might just wanna get yourself a can of beer, and then you gotta wait behind the lady who's paying for her whole cart of-

[laughs]

... you know, goods. And all you want is one little can, but that's the one item you can't buy 'cause of dirty thieves.

Yeah.

So you should hang out by the self-checkout at Winco.

You can go to a convenience store and pay triple.

Yeah, exactly. [laughs]

[laughs]

You know, and they don't have the same selection as good old Winco, so...

And it's walking distance.

It, it is, it is. But, uh, you know, when you gotta take all that extra time-

[laughs]

... you don't have time to walk anymore.

The buzz wears off before you get home. [laughs]

[laughs] Don't drive buzzed, everybody. I saw the billboard. Buzzed is the same as drunk driving.

Same as drunk driving.

That's right.

Yeah, and by the time you... That's an evil cycle because you just keep making a circle. [laughs]

[laughs] Like, I shoulda got four of 'em. I have to wait in line for years. [laughs] All right, everybody. Traffic School happens every Friday morning, 8:45 AM. And, uh, sorry you didn't get to go on your motorcycle ride, and, uh, I'll, I'll hit you up and let you know what's up this afternoon.

I can't wait.

All right. I'm gonna chug lots of coffee-

[laughs]

... see if I can get motivated to do anything aside from sit.

[laughs]

Sit in front of that big TV, crank up the AC, and, uh, hang out with cats. Yeah.

You know what I'd like to do is have you pay me some money one day and hang out with me for [laughs] the weekend and just go do what I, do what I do for the weekend. See, see how it goes.

Oh, I'd probably be so tired.

[laughs]

'Cause you, all you do is work. [laughs] You got like 10 jobs.

Y- you get paid to have my life experience.

Ugh. Yeah. It, it, it sounds exhausting.

That would be awesome.

Ugh.

Listen to you whine and complain [laughs] the whole time.

I need more coffee now.

[laughs]

All right. [laughs] All right, listeners. We'll get some tunes going in a second. Get yourselves ready to go the Chubbuck Walmart, 11:00 AM to 1:00 PM. Come see me, get signed up to win some tickets to Mudvayne at the Portneuf-Hell Trust Amphitheater.

Traffic School is a production of Riverbend Media Group. To get more info on the show or to contact us, hit up our website, riverbendmediagroup.com.

Traffic School - 09/12/2025
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